How to Tell if you Have Smelly Feet

Dinner Date

During class, a teacher trying to teach good manners, asks the students: "Students, If you were on a date, having supper with a nice young lady,how would you tell her that you have to go to the bathroom? Michael?"

Michael: "Just a minute, I have to go pee."

Teacher: "That would be rude and impolite!!!

Teacher: "What about you Peter, how would you say it?"

Peter: "I am sorry, but I really need to go to the bathroom, I'll be right back."

Teacher: "That's better, but it's still not very nice to say the word bathroom at the dinner table.

And you Little Johnny, are you able to use your intelligence for once and show us your good manners?"

Johnny: "I would say: 'Darling, may I please be excused for a moment? I have to shake hands with a very dear friend of mine, who I hope you'll get to meet after supper. "

The teacher fainted!!

.......clever boy..

A Dentist's Wisdom

A man went to the dental surgeon to have a tooth pulled. The dentist
pulls out a freezing needle to give the man. "No way! No needles! I
hate needles!" the patient said. The dentist starts to hook up the
laughing gas and the man again objects. "I can't do the gas thing - the
thought of having the gas mask on is suffocating to me!" The dentist
then asks if the man has any objection to taking a pill. "No,"- the
patient says, -"I am fine with pills".

The dentist then returns and says, "Here is a Viagra tablet."
The patient says, "Wow - I didn't know Viagra worked as a pain pill!"
"It doesn't,"- said the dentist -"but it will give you something to
hold onto when I pull out your tooth."

Two hour lunch

"I'm sorry," the boss told an employee, "but if I let you take a two-hour lunch 

today, every worker whose wife gives birth to quadruplets will want one too."

Innocence at its best

A three-year-old walked up to a pregnant lady while waiting with his mother
in the doctors office.He inquisitively asked the lady, "Why is your stomach so big?"
She replied, "I'm having a baby." With big eyes, he asked, "Is the baby in your stomach?" She answered, "He sure is." Then the little boy, with a puzzled look, asked, "Is it a good baby?" She said, "Oh, yes. It's a real good baby." With an even more surprised and shocked look, he asked,

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"Then why did you eat him?"

Technical Support

Caller: Hi, our printer is not working.
Customer Service: What is wrong with it?
Caller: Mouse is jammed.
Customer Service: Mouse? And how it is related to printer?!!!
Caller: Mmmm.. Wait, I will send a picture.